Monday, May 26, 2014

The Battle

A couple of nights ago, the shadow thing in the shower area appeared again, but before that happened, I was still up, working on my computer, I was thinking about going to bed, it was around midnight'ish, I usually take my MP3 player to bed with me, I usually listen to a Coast to Coast am downloaded podcast, this night I was "told"

"You need to pray."

It was emphatic yet matter of fact, it was not a request, it was a statement of what I needed to do, I fully believe that came directly from my Lord (the Christian God in case there is any question), I don't argue with that voice. I shut down my computer, I took my MP3 player and stuck it under my pillow, just in case it was a short prayer (grin), but didn't expect to turn it on that night.

I got in bed, turned to face the window that goes into the shower area and began to pray. My prayer started out simple enough, I asked for forgiveness of my sins, I thanked and praised God, then I said "here I am, what am I supposed to do?". I repeated that several times, being quiet and still between queries. That's when I began to see that shadow flitting around in the shower again.

It was the same thing I saw before http://thingsthatgobumpinthenights.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-night-shadow-creature-is-back.html 

 I began telling this thing that I wasn't afraid, and I began quoting Psalms 23, especially the part about "I will fear no evil, for You are with me, Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me",  and I truly had no fear, I began putting on the armor or God, praying the white light of protection around me and pleading the Blood of Jesus around me and against it.

This was a battle, but it felt like quite a one sided battle, it was not a struggle for me at all, I had the protection of my Father, this thing could do no harm, all it could do was leave, and eventually it did.

I have battled spiritual beings before, and it was a struggle, this time there was no struggle, none on my part, I just continued to pray until it was gone. I don't know how long that lasted, it could have been 10 minutes, it could have been an hour, time had no meaning right then.

Then I really went into praising my God, telling Him that He was my God, my Master, my Father, my Protector, I imagined kneeling at the feet of a King, giving my all to Him. That night I felt closer to my God than I have ever felt before.

There was more to the "message" I was given, but that part is private and I don't feel it's necessary to share it now, perhaps in the future I'll be able to, but for now, it was for me to hear.

I haven't seen that shadow creature since then, I have a feeling it's gone for good, but if it isn't, I know what to do. :)

I pray, but they are rarely formal-dry things quoted from memory, they are more like conversations, chats, praises, giving thanks, prayers are mostly started by myself, I think this is the first time a prayer session was "requested" of me like this, I must say, I rather like it :)

Wretha

Friday, May 9, 2014

The night shadow creature is back....

It's been a while since I've written, in my last post I talked about a new realization about some of the things that happened in my childhood, things I didn't understand, but now I have a new understanding about it. I am once again comfortable with everything, even the things that have changed.

One thing I had to come to a conclusion about was how this fits into my religious views, I hesitate to use the term religion because IMHO religion is how MAN screwed up our relationship with God, when I say MY religious views, I'm really saying my relationship with my Lord.

The conclusion I came to was it didn't matter what happened to me then, now or anything in between, I am still the same person, God is still God and nothing else matters or can change that.

So with that out of the way, I can continue with my journey. Things have been fairly quiet since writing last, I still see things on a daily basis, movements, sparks of light, shadows, the normal daily things, but still pretty quiet, until the last few weeks. I have been seeing extra things, one thing in particular is a flash of light inside the house, I know it's not just "in my head" because it happens in a particular space, between objects in my house, if it was just my eyes playing tricks, then it would be superimposed over my view obscuring everything.

I have seen this flash of light in a place where there are electronics, BUT the LED lights on this electronic item doesn't face toward the wall, it's over near my off grid power setup inside the house, the flash reflected off the wall, when I first saw it I was concerned that it could have something to do with the electronics there, then when I considered it, I knew there was no way there could be a light THERE, there just isn't a spot that could generate a light that would reflect off the wall in THAT SPOT. I have seen that a couple of times. I have no idea what it is or what it could mean.

The other thing that is new, well new in that I haven't seen this phenomena since I was a pre-teen, I used to see this nearly every night, it used to scare me a little, I think the purpose of seeing it was to try to scare me, eventually I quit being afraid of it, even getting mad at it and telling it that I wasn't afraid of it anymore, that's when it stopped happening on such a regular basis.

Now to explain what I saw, my bed is next to 2 windows, the window nearest my feet goes to the outdoors, the window closest to my head is the common wall between the bedroom and the shower. This shower area is large, like a good size walk in closet, there are 2 big windows in there that are on the outside wall, they stay open most of the time. The window between my bedroom and the bathroom has a plastic translucent sheet hanging on it, the idea is to give privacy to the person in the shower and still let light into the bedroom. This plastic sheet is attached at the top and the bottom so it can't billow around when the wind blows or when you go in or out of the shower.

The light in the shower gives off a tiny bit of light, even when the switch is in the off position, it's an issue with the wiring that we have deemed to be safe, a happy accident, we treat it like a night light. I can see the light from my bed through the plastic sheet.

Last night when I went to bed, it was actually early this morning (I am a night owl), I was facing the window, I could just faintly make out the glow of the light in shower, the wind was calm. I began seeing what looked like a shadow going back and forth in the shower area, it was quite active, it was as if there was a large bird flying back and forth, except if there had been a bird in there, as fast as the shadow was flitting back and forth, it WOULD have run into something or made some sort of noise, this was silent. I'd estimate the object I was seeing was perhaps a couple of feet in length, maybe a foot in width but with trailing black as if it had fabric that was flying out behind it, it was in the middle to upper part of the room.

I lay there, watching this movement, it was happening right in front of my face, no "corner of my eye" going on, it was constant, fast, erratic, it didn't scare me though, what made me realize it was a spiritual thing, or at least not of this world, was the fact that every now and again whatever thing dark shadowy thing was, it popped through the wall close to the ceiling, it would come in to my room, right over my bed, it would enter about a foot then flit back. It was mostly solid, but with a slight translucence to it.

I could also see the reflection in the glass of the door to my bedroom, there is a reflected light from the nightlight in the main room of the house. I could see a shadow moving around there too, but the main activity was going on just a couple of feet away from me, right in front of my face.

I watched this for a few minutes, then I closed my eyes to pray, I plead the Blood of Jesus on myself and I asked for the white light of protection around me, then I opened my eyes again, the shadow was still there, just as active as it had been, continuing to pop through the wall above the window into my room then shooting back.

I tried looking in different ways, following the shadow, then keeping my eyes on one spot as the shadow flashed back and forth. The best way I can describe it is, think of how it looks when you see reflected firelight from a candle or campfire, the light flickers and plays on the objects in the area, well if you were to make the light be dark, that's how it looked, it flickered, it flicked, it shot back and forth in the shower space. There was about a half moon last night, so there was a bit of light from outside, plus the tiny bit of light from the light fixture, this shadow was flying in front of that.

I finally fell asleep, I woke about an hour later, it was just before the sun was about to start coming up, still dark outside, I was still facing the window, the shadow was gone, the room looked perfectly normal, I looked hard and saw nothing out of the ordinary.

This didn't scare me, I wasn't concerned about going to sleep with it going on, I don't know what it was, I wonder if it will be back tonight when I go to bed, I'll look to see. I have no interest in communicating with whatever this thing is, I'm not sure if it's a spirit thing or an alien thing, I'm not sure if this was something that was just there and I happened to be able to see it, or if it was there specifically FOR me to see, I am leaning toward the latter.

The similarity of what I used to see as a kid, I would go to bed, the lights would be turned off, there was almost always enough light coming in from outside of the window, there must have been a streetlight out there. I could usually easily see what was in my room-the walls, the furniture, my toys... until this black shadow thing would arrive, sometimes it would be there as soon as the lights went out, sometimes it would appear long after the lights were out. This thing didn't have a shape, it was just big and dark, it would roll and boil, obscuring my vision, filling the room, causing me much fear and sometimes even terror, I would pray and pray, it would eventually go away. I also had nightmares about it. I don't know if this is the same thing or a similar thing, it just reminds me of it because of being dark and flitting around.

With this activity ramping up, I don't know what to think about it, it doesn't disturb me, it just IS.

Friday, January 17, 2014

Paradigm shift....

For those who have followed this blog, I think I've made myself pretty clear on where I stand on the things I have seen and experienced all of my life, I have grown comfortable with it as something that just "is". Well, a few days ago, I listened to a Coast to Coast am show that has sent me down new path, one that is going to be a paradigm shift for me.

The show which aired on October, was called Aliens & Abductions,  the guest was Derrel Sims, he is better known as the Alien Hunter. As I listened to this show, more and more things began resonating with me, things I didn't necessarily want to have resonate.

I don't know if I'm ready to explain everything now, I don't know if I even can, not now, not yet, BUT the floodgates have been opened and I don't think I can pretend this isn't happening.

This is one example of what is bubbling up in my mind, I didn't "forget" about this, in fact I have very vivid memories about it, but didn't understand why it happened the way it did, now I believe I understand what happened (or at least part of it) and it makes perfect sense.

I was a young child, I was in bed with my mom, the room was dark except for a street light outside of the window, I could see a silhouette of a man on the window shade, it was not a trick of light and shadow, it WAS the perfect shape and size to be a man standing outside of the window, I woke my mother up, I was terrified, she looked at it and groggily told me to go back to sleep, I asked her if she could see it and she said she could, but that it was just a trick of the light and to go back to sleep, she turned over and fell back asleep, I could NOT understand what was going on, she could see this yet didn't get up to investigate, this was NOT like my mother, even if she had believed this was a trick of the light, she normally would have gotten up and looked out the window, if nothing else but to show me that everything was OK. There is a lot more to this story, I'm leaving out many details, I'm not ready to go into it yet, I have to get this straight in my head first, this is exciting, this is scary too, but this can of worms has been opened and I can't un-open it. I also believe I am about to learn about the things that have happened to me all of my life, maybe not all of the answers, but I am understanding some things.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

The Dream

Dreams, they are funny things, and in most cases, they have the most meaning to the dreamer and to no one else.

I awoke this morning in the midst of a dream that was a delight (in the dream), though if it happened in reality I wouldn't be so excited about it, I'd deal with it and live with it, but it wouldn't be ideal.

I dreamed I was pregnant, in a nutshell, dreaming about being pregnant usually represents a major change is coming, when I awoke I was deciphering the dream and realized that going by the time hints I know that the "change" that was being more than hinted at was about how our lives were going to change and was about the time just before we moved off grid and didn't refer to now. (*)

Here is the dream.

I was at my dad's house, he was still alive, my sister and her best friend had arrived at the house, I had just found out I was pregnant, very pregnant, to the point where I was going to soon go into labor. I was in bed and had just awoke when my sister and her friend arrived, it was so early in the morning that it was still dark. I was debating having my child at home but realized that at my age it would be near impossible to find a midwife that would agree, and it was clear that I hadn't had any medical care during my pregnancy (apparently I didn't know I was pregnant, I thought I was going through the beginning stages of menopause and that was why I wasn't having regular periods, that is something that is going on now in my life and wasn't happening back then...). I was resigning myself to having this baby in a hospital.

After I got out of bed, I noticed my dad was on the phone and seemed to be irritated with whoever he was talking to, it turned out to be a financial organization, I had some money in this financial company and was trying to get it cashed out, my dad was talking as if they had the wrong number and was trying to hang up on them. I was trying to get to him to get the phone out of his hands before he hung up, he managed to get the phone nearly on the hook before I got my hands on it, fortunately he hadn't disconnected the call yet.

As I spoke on the phone, I found out that the stocks that I wanted to cash out were at an all time high and it was a good time to cash out. While doing the transaction, I began telling the lady on the phone about my pregnancy, how excited I was, I told her that I only had one son, that I had made the decision that if I hadn't had another child by the time he started kindergarten that I wouldn't have another child, I didn't want to have children with a huge age gap, so I didn't have another child after my son.

I was watching my son running around the back yard while having this conversation, he was 17 going on 18 in the dream, (that was a time frame hint for me to let me know it wasn't the present). I was running the numbers through my head to figure out the age difference between the two of them.

By this time, I had wandered out into the back yard, still talking to this lady on the phone. The sky was dark, but I could see an aircraft of sorts in the sky (**), it was coming out of the east heading west, it seemed to be a blimp of sorts, but militarized, able to move faster and maneuver easily, it was also armored and quiet, there was a large one and a smaller one attached to it, next to it, not behind or in front of it.

I had time to consider Bob in the dream, I knew we were about to move across the state and live a completely different life, I wondered how having a baby would change our lives. I was also calculating how old I would be at each major stage of my baby's life, how old I would be when school started, during graduation, marriage and such. It was also noted that Bob wasn't there in the dream, that was OK though, he was getting our west Texas-off grid home ready.

In the dream I was delighted about becoming a mother again, even though I knew it would radically change my life. In real life, if I were to find out I was pregnant, well as I said above, I would live with it, I don't believe in abortion, especially if it's just a case of inconvenience. I would accept it and go on with my life, but it wouldn't be what I would want to have happen.


(*) The time frame for the dream was just before we moved to our off grid home, the time hints were the age of my son, being almost 18, my dad still being alive, trying to cash in stock (it was Best Buy employee stock), yet there were hints of today, going through peri-menopause, there were many more hints of this being a previous time rather than being in the present time.

(**) Over the years, I have had recurring dreams of military craft flying over the backyard of my dad's house, it is ALWAYS ominous, sometimes they stop and hover in the air, that is the scariest part. Sometimes in the dreams the aircraft crash in or near my dad's backyard, I always have a deep seated fear of what this means. In each of the dreams, the airplanes are always different, it's not an identical dream, but definitely a recurring theme. Also, the airplanes almost always come out of the west or a westerly direction, in this dream, it was very clear that it came out of the east, far far in the east, heading west.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Roses Roses

About a week and a half ago, I had an interesting experience over at a friend's house. I was over there, about to get ready to leave, when I smelled a very strong scent, it was the scent of roses, very strong, very definite, there was no mistaking the scent. I could only smell it in a certain area in the kitchen, I could walk into the "scent" space and out of it, I asked my friend if there was anything that could possibly smell like roses in her kitchen area and she assured me there was nothing.

She came over and sniffed the air, I could still smell it strongly, and she was well within the scent bubble, but she couldn't smell it at all, this was not subtle, it was strong and definite.

At one point it vanished, then it came back, in the same spot. I walked around sniffing the various things to see if it was coming from something, it was not the laundry, it was not the fruit in a bag nearby, it was not coming from anything, but it was in the air, in a certain area, a 3D scent bubble that I could detect the edges, where it was and where it wasn't.

My friend suggested that "Mother Mary" was known to have the scent of roses associated with her, well I am not a Catholic, I don't believe in praying to saints or Mary, I do not believe that had anything to do with what I was smelling.

Another possibility is my mother, she loved roses, she had a difficult time finding perfumes that she could wear, they tended to go sour on her, she blamed her chemistry. One of the few scents she could wear was one by Avon called Roses Roses, and yes, it smelled just like roses. I did NOT feel the presence of my mother, I didn't really "feel" anything, I just smelled the scent very strongly.

It eventually dissipated, I haven't smelled it since, it was very odd though, I don't usually smell things like that, I'm more a visual or auditory person, I see and hear things, I even sense the presence of things (feel them), sometimes they physically touch me, but it's so very rare for me to smell something like that...