The Rest of the Battle

In my previous post, written several months ago, I discussed a battle that went on right next to me, I hesitate to say it was a battle between this thing and MYSELF, as it was quite one sided, I had the ultimate power in the universe fighting this battle for me, all I had to do was pray which is what I was TOLD to do.

Now as to the "message" I was given, I was to die that night. That didn't frighten me, I've been there and I know what to expect. As I was praying, praising God, I felt a pressure on my head, it began pushing me down, as if I was going through my pillow, through my bed, I continued praying, telling God I was ready to go if it was my time, I know I was being pushed out of my body.

Then I though about PB, laying in the bed, he would find my lifeless body the following morning, that part would be sad for sure, but I also had some unfinished business, some financial business, I didn't have a will drawn up, he could potentially be left out in the cold, I told God, if this was His will, I would submit, but if it was possible, I would like enough time to get my earthly affairs in order, then I would gladly go.

I heard the phrase "2 weeks" in my head and the pressure stopped. After that, I continued praying for a while, then went to sleep.

I was not trying to negotiate for more time just to stay alive longer, I truly wanted to get my earthly affairs put together, I had no idea how my demise would happen, but I was ready to go when it did.

I had a talk with my preacher about this, though I was completely at peace about it, I just wanted at least one person to know what was going on, I also needed someone to witness my will, I had another person in mind but wouldn't tell that person until later. I also wanted someone to help PB get through losing me, he would have a great change in his life and would need the help of caring friends to do what needed to be done.

A few days later, I sought the advice of a very connected (to God) Christian, he is very spiritual, I had a long talk with he and his wife, I knew I could get confirmation from him about what happened to me that night, if the confirmation was that I was going to die within the time specified, then so be it, but if the confirmation was in the negative about that, well I would just see what happened.

After much discussion and deep prayer, he and his wife both felt like this wasn't a message from God, but instead a "parting gift" from this evil entity, it was trying to scare me, most people when challenged by death are so afraid of dying that they will try to beg their way out of it, or perhaps it was a way to try to distract me or test my faith. Either way, I have to say that it had just the opposite effect on me, that next two weeks, I walked around on clouds, I was almost ecstatic,  I was going to be with my Jesus, my God, death held no fear for me, I was ready and willing to go.

The 2 week period passed uneventfully, I did get some important things taken care of that I had put off for far too long. That creature has not been back nor do I expect to see it again, but if it should show itself again, I have no doubt about the outcome.

Wretha

The Battle

A couple of nights ago, the shadow thing in the shower area appeared again, but before that happened, I was still up, working on my computer, I was thinking about going to bed, it was around midnight'ish, I usually take my MP3 player to bed with me, I usually listen to a Coast to Coast am downloaded podcast, this night I was "told"

"You need to pray."

It was emphatic yet matter of fact, it was not a request, it was a statement of what I needed to do, I fully believe that came directly from my Lord (the Christian God in case there is any question), I don't argue with that voice. I shut down my computer, I took my MP3 player and stuck it under my pillow, just in case it was a short prayer (grin), but didn't expect to turn it on that night.

I got in bed, turned to face the window that goes into the shower area and began to pray. My prayer started out simple enough, I asked for forgiveness of my sins, I thanked and praised God, then I said "here I am, what am I supposed to do?". I repeated that several times, being quiet and still between queries. That's when I began to see that shadow flitting around in the shower again.

It was the same thing I saw before http://thingsthatgobumpinthenights.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-night-shadow-creature-is-back.html 

 I began telling this thing that I wasn't afraid, and I began quoting Psalms 23, especially the part about "I will fear no evil, for You are with me, Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me",  and I truly had no fear, I began putting on the armor or God, praying the white light of protection around me and pleading the Blood of Jesus around me and against it.

This was a battle, but it felt like quite a one sided battle, it was not a struggle for me at all, I had the protection of my Father, this thing could do no harm, all it could do was leave, and eventually it did.

I have battled spiritual beings before, and it was a struggle, this time there was no struggle, none on my part, I just continued to pray until it was gone. I don't know how long that lasted, it could have been 10 minutes, it could have been an hour, time had no meaning right then.

Then I really went into praising my God, telling Him that He was my God, my Master, my Father, my Protector, I imagined kneeling at the feet of a King, giving my all to Him. That night I felt closer to my God than I have ever felt before.

There was more to the "message" I was given, but that part is private and I don't feel it's necessary to share it now, perhaps in the future I'll be able to, but for now, it was for me to hear.

I haven't seen that shadow creature since then, I have a feeling it's gone for good, but if it isn't, I know what to do. :)

I pray, but they are rarely formal-dry things quoted from memory, they are more like conversations, chats, praises, giving thanks, prayers are mostly started by myself, I think this is the first time a prayer session was "requested" of me like this, I must say, I rather like it :)

Wretha

The night shadow creature is back....

It's been a while since I've written, in my last post I talked about a new realization about some of the things that happened in my childhood, things I didn't understand, but now I have a new understanding about it. I am once again comfortable with everything, even the things that have changed.

One thing I had to come to a conclusion about was how this fits into my religious views, I hesitate to use the term religion because IMHO religion is how MAN screwed up our relationship with God, when I say MY religious views, I'm really saying my relationship with my Lord.

The conclusion I came to was it didn't matter what happened to me then, now or anything in between, I am still the same person, God is still God and nothing else matters or can change that.

So with that out of the way, I can continue with my journey. Things have been fairly quiet since writing last, I still see things on a daily basis, movements, sparks of light, shadows, the normal daily things, but still pretty quiet, until the last few weeks. I have been seeing extra things, one thing in particular is a flash of light inside the house, I know it's not just "in my head" because it happens in a particular space, between objects in my house, if it was just my eyes playing tricks, then it would be superimposed over my view obscuring everything.

I have seen this flash of light in a place where there are electronics, BUT the LED lights on this electronic item doesn't face toward the wall, it's over near my off grid power setup inside the house, the flash reflected off the wall, when I first saw it I was concerned that it could have something to do with the electronics there, then when I considered it, I knew there was no way there could be a light THERE, there just isn't a spot that could generate a light that would reflect off the wall in THAT SPOT. I have seen that a couple of times. I have no idea what it is or what it could mean.

The other thing that is new, well new in that I haven't seen this phenomena since I was a pre-teen, I used to see this nearly every night, it used to scare me a little, I think the purpose of seeing it was to try to scare me, eventually I quit being afraid of it, even getting mad at it and telling it that I wasn't afraid of it anymore, that's when it stopped happening on such a regular basis.

Now to explain what I saw, my bed is next to 2 windows, the window nearest my feet goes to the outdoors, the window closest to my head is the common wall between the bedroom and the shower. This shower area is large, like a good size walk in closet, there are 2 big windows in there that are on the outside wall, they stay open most of the time. The window between my bedroom and the bathroom has a plastic translucent sheet hanging on it, the idea is to give privacy to the person in the shower and still let light into the bedroom. This plastic sheet is attached at the top and the bottom so it can't billow around when the wind blows or when you go in or out of the shower.

The light in the shower gives off a tiny bit of light, even when the switch is in the off position, it's an issue with the wiring that we have deemed to be safe, a happy accident, we treat it like a night light. I can see the light from my bed through the plastic sheet.

Last night when I went to bed, it was actually early this morning (I am a night owl), I was facing the window, I could just faintly make out the glow of the light in shower, the wind was calm. I began seeing what looked like a shadow going back and forth in the shower area, it was quite active, it was as if there was a large bird flying back and forth, except if there had been a bird in there, as fast as the shadow was flitting back and forth, it WOULD have run into something or made some sort of noise, this was silent. I'd estimate the object I was seeing was perhaps a couple of feet in length, maybe a foot in width but with trailing black as if it had fabric that was flying out behind it, it was in the middle to upper part of the room.

I lay there, watching this movement, it was happening right in front of my face, no "corner of my eye" going on, it was constant, fast, erratic, it didn't scare me though, what made me realize it was a spiritual thing, or at least not of this world, was the fact that every now and again whatever thing dark shadowy thing was, it popped through the wall close to the ceiling, it would come in to my room, right over my bed, it would enter about a foot then flit back. It was mostly solid, but with a slight translucence to it.

I could also see the reflection in the glass of the door to my bedroom, there is a reflected light from the nightlight in the main room of the house. I could see a shadow moving around there too, but the main activity was going on just a couple of feet away from me, right in front of my face.

I watched this for a few minutes, then I closed my eyes to pray, I plead the Blood of Jesus on myself and I asked for the white light of protection around me, then I opened my eyes again, the shadow was still there, just as active as it had been, continuing to pop through the wall above the window into my room then shooting back.

I tried looking in different ways, following the shadow, then keeping my eyes on one spot as the shadow flashed back and forth. The best way I can describe it is, think of how it looks when you see reflected firelight from a candle or campfire, the light flickers and plays on the objects in the area, well if you were to make the light be dark, that's how it looked, it flickered, it flicked, it shot back and forth in the shower space. There was about a half moon last night, so there was a bit of light from outside, plus the tiny bit of light from the light fixture, this shadow was flying in front of that.

I finally fell asleep, I woke about an hour later, it was just before the sun was about to start coming up, still dark outside, I was still facing the window, the shadow was gone, the room looked perfectly normal, I looked hard and saw nothing out of the ordinary.

This didn't scare me, I wasn't concerned about going to sleep with it going on, I don't know what it was, I wonder if it will be back tonight when I go to bed, I'll look to see. I have no interest in communicating with whatever this thing is, I'm not sure if it's a spirit thing or an alien thing, I'm not sure if this was something that was just there and I happened to be able to see it, or if it was there specifically FOR me to see, I am leaning toward the latter.

The similarity of what I used to see as a kid, I would go to bed, the lights would be turned off, there was almost always enough light coming in from outside of the window, there must have been a streetlight out there. I could usually easily see what was in my room-the walls, the furniture, my toys... until this black shadow thing would arrive, sometimes it would be there as soon as the lights went out, sometimes it would appear long after the lights were out. This thing didn't have a shape, it was just big and dark, it would roll and boil, obscuring my vision, filling the room, causing me much fear and sometimes even terror, I would pray and pray, it would eventually go away. I also had nightmares about it. I don't know if this is the same thing or a similar thing, it just reminds me of it because of being dark and flitting around.

With this activity ramping up, I don't know what to think about it, it doesn't disturb me, it just IS.

Lot's O' Stuff Going On

I have been meaning to write more here, don't ya just hate it when a blogger keeps saying that? So here I am. My spiritual life has been growing and growing.  I am getting more and more comfortable with myself and my spirituality at the same time. I had a few adjustments to make after my baptism, there were some small things were taken from me, at the time I had no idea what those would be, I just hoped it wouldn't be everything about my spiritual life, but was willing to give up any and all of it if that was necessary, I can truly thank God that it was not all taken, just tweaked to be even better.

My walk and talk with God has gotten better and better, closer and closer. I am participating in a Christian class at church, it's by John MacArthur, it's called Fundamentals of the Faith, I have enjoyed learning more and more, even if I don't agree with everything MacArthur says, especially about the spiritual gifts, he says some of them were only meant for the Bible days and aren't meant for today, I disagree, when God gives gifts, He doesn't take them back. I also know that we humans aren't going to agree with each other 100% of the time...

To update some of my spiritual experiences I have had recently, a month ago (+/-) I was in my Bug on the way to church in the afternoon, I was by myself, I live in a very rural area with mountainous dirt roads that are curvy and have lots of hills and valleys. There are places where the road is not wide enough for 2 vehicles to pass, it's a good idea to drive slow out here, sometimes I will think I'm going too fast only to look down and see I am going 15 mph. Anyhoo, I was going to the church, doing my normal speed on this particular part of the road, I was "told" to slow down, I didn't question it or even think about it, I just did it, I dropped my speed by about 5 mph, I began looking ahead to see why I had been instructed to slow down. I expected to see animals in the road (a common occurrence out here), maybe deer or feral donkeys, I was coming to a curve in the road when I saw the UPS truck coming the opposite direction, he was in the middle of the road coming around that curve, there was not enough room for both of us to be on that spot at the same time, if I hadn't slowed down, I would have been there at the same time as the UPS truck, would there have been a crash? I don't know, possibly a crash, possibly one or both of us might have ended up sliding off the road, I do know that it would have been at least a close call, not something I relish thinking about, much less experiencing...

I am still seeing into the spirit world, little sparks of light, the glowing orbs, the shadows and such.  For the most part, I just look and go on, I don't try to interact or communicate with whatever these things are. My neighbor's house had been pretty quiet the last few months, but things have been ramping back up, I have been seeing different things there, things like sparks of light near the ceiling. Yesterday, I was down there with my Dad, he had fallen asleep in the recliner, I laid down on the couch to catch a nap too, when I saw a large, shaggy looking shadow flying across the cabinet doors in the dining room, I have been seeing more and more activity in that part of the house. This only lasted a few seconds, but was significantly different from the other things I have seen there, it left an impression on my mind. I didn't say anything to my Dad about this though. So today, after church, we ate lunch at my neighbor's house, then my Dad laid back in the recliner and wanted to take a nap, I told him I was going up to my house, if he needed me, he could call me.

I had gotten up to my house (it's a bit of a hike up a mountain side to get to my house), I had enough time to get on the internet and check my email when my Dad called, he said he needed me back down there asap. When I got there, he was a little shaken up, he said he had not been asleep yet, but his eyes were closed, then something grabbed his foot. He opened his eyes and saw nothing, then he saw what he described at a large, dark tubular thing near the ceiling going toward the dining room. He rebuked it and it left him alone. Shortly after I got back down there, he told me that he saw something else, it looked like a small bird going toward the dining room, his dog also responded to this. It's strange that the sightings in that house had changed so much, I hadn't said anything to my Dad about this, yet he is also seeing these things too.

I have another 2 things to write about, I'll only tease you with them and say they are VERY GOOD THINGS, exciting things, somewhat scary too, but not in the spooky sense, scary because of the great potential and the responsibility that go with it. I'll write about them in the next few days.

Bloodlines and Points

My bloodlines are many and varied, I am English, Irish, German-Dutch, Comanche and Apache, this is in no particular order, it's merely the order in which I memorized it. I know that my Native American bloodlines were/are very spiritual, I understand that the Irish can be superstitious as well as having a rich spiritual history, I don't know about the English or German-Dutch, I searched and didn't find too much. Though I did find something interesting about one superstition that many people do, it's knocking on wood, I have often wondered where and how that one came about. I found another reason why people knock on wood.

This is for the German ancestors.

When you see your friends at a Stammtisch in a German bar, you have to greet them by knocking on the wooden table 3 times. It is said that most Stammtisch tables used to be made of Oak wood, and the Devil was unable to touch Oak wood, because it was a holy tree. So knocking on the table was proving you weren’t the Devil. source

I have no idea what or who Stammtisch is. OK, a quick toss around Google and I find: The word Stammtisch is German. It is not easily translated into English but it means something like "regular's table" or "regular get-together".

I know I got the Irish and American Indian from my mother, and my mother's side of the family were spiritual in the sense that they could see spirits and spiritual activity. I was told the story of my mother as a young teen, maybe younger than that, she saw a snake going from one bedroom across the hall into her bedroom. This was no ordinary snake, it's body was at least a foot thick, she never saw the head or tail, she got her dad, my grandfather, he saw it too.

They both went into her bedroom to look for this snake, they never found it, I understand my grandfather tore the room apart, even going so far as to take a knife and cut open an upholstered chair just in case it got in there. They never found the snake, nor did they see it again. This snake was much too large to have gotten past anyone, there were no open windows. My grandfather refused to talk about it.

I have been in that house both as a young child, and a teen, that house was very active with spirit activity, I was never completely comfortable in that house. I think there was a lot of unhappiness in that house over the years.

I wonder if my mother's side of the family, being of Irish and Native American descent is the reason why I have been so blessed with the ability to see into the spirit world.

I wonder if just being in a family that was open to and aware of the spirit world was the reason...

I wonder if certain nationalities are more open to that sort of thing? I wonder if it's heredity in the same way hair and eye color can be, or even more like artistic or musical ability.

That's another thing, being artistic and/or musical. I also come from artists and musicians, perhaps that also allows the creative mind to blossom, therefore also being more open to the spirit world.

Perhaps it's like "points", having a Native American and Irish blood gives me a couple of "points", being from musical and artistic people gave me a couple of "points", having an open minded (about the belief in the spirit world) family gives me a "point", rack up enough "points" and boom, eyes open, can see into the spirit world... Maybe if you don't have or get enough "points", you generally don't get to do this.

My father says he really never had experiences like this until he met and married my mother, perhaps my dad had nearly enough "points", being a creative and musical person, and whatever else he had going for him that might allow for this, but not quite enough until he met my mother, that being what pushed it over the top and them boom, his eyes are opened...

All these questions to ponder...

The Night My Mom Came For A Visit

Here is a strange occurrence that happened to me. This happened back in 87 or 88, my (now ex) husband and our almost 2 year old son were living in Oregon with my inlaws. We slept in the converted attic, my hubby and I had the room on one side, our son had the room on the other side. I was very close to my mom and missed her terribly, she was back in Texas. We didn't get to talk very often and I knew it would be a long time before I saw her again. This was the first time I had been this far away from home and my family.

Our bed was a double sized bed, we barely had enough room to sleep on this bed, we were constantly jostling for space. The bed was pushed against one wall, I slept on that side, so often times I was squished against the wall. One night,  I don't believe I had been alseep yet, I was being really pushed into the wall, I was laying on my back, I turned my head toward my hubby, I was about to ask for more room, or just gently push him over, before I could speak, I could see a third person in the bed between us. This was a full grown person, not our son, he was sleeping in a crib and couldn't get out. There was a bright light right outside the window so I could see clearly that there was another person in the bed.

I froze, not knowing exactly what I should do first, then I realized it was my mother! Now anyone who has a perverted mind can just go away right now, or at least thank me for the fantasy fodder. I could feel my mother's body up against mine, shoulder to shoulder, arm to arm, hip to hip, leg to leg. I wondered what I should do. I could clearly see her, feel her, I could also see my hubby on the edge of the bed, on the verge of falling off. I was very comforted by all of this, it reminded me of when I was a child, all of us kids would climb into bed with mom and dad, especially on the weekends, there was no safer or more comfortable place. So that night I was transported back to my childhood, albeit briefly. I was afraid to move, afraid it would all disappear. I stayed awake as long as I could, eventually I fell asleep. The next morning, I was disappointed to realize that she wasn't really there, though I knew in reality that she wouldn't be there. I asked my hubby if he remembered anything about the night before, he said that I was really crowding him.

The other thing I realized the next morning is that my mother was not wearing anything, I felt no clothing, no nightgown or anything. I thought this strange as my mother was always cold, especially at night, as far back as I could remember my mother wore nightgowns to bed, flannel in the winter, and lighter materials in the summer. This was in the middle of winter, so my mother should have been wearing SOMETHING to bed.

I called my mother that day to ask her if she remembered anything about the night before, she didn't, she said she slept just fine, then I asked her about sleeping in the nude, well to my surprise she told me that she had been sleeping in the nude for some time. Talk about a confirmation! I told her about what happened, she wasn't surprised about it at all, though she had no memory of it.

There were many other things that happened in my in-law's house in the time we lived there. This house was over 100 years old, it was in a historic district, which only meant that you had to go before a committee if you wanted to change the color of your house, or do anything that would affect the outside appearance of the house. Anyhoo, one thing that was always in the house was something referred to as a residual, I could see a man standing just outside the landing for the attic stairs, he was about to go up the stairs. He never moved or reacted, I didn't feel anything from him, he was merely a 3D snapshop, this was not a spirit, just a memory. I don't know what caused this residual to happen right there, but it was definitely there. He wore a red and black flannel, long sleeved shirt and either brown or dark tan pants. He has short, dark hair, I wonder if he was a logger. I couldn't see him if I looked directly at him, I had to use my peripheral vision.

Another thing that happened in that house was one weekend, my in-laws had gone out of town for the weekend. My hubby was taking a shower, I was chasing our son through the house, we were having fun. The bathroom door was open, I could hear things hitting the floor in the bathroom, then I heard my hubby yell at our son to stop it and get out. Well our son was with me, not in the bathroom. I went in there to see what he was yelling about, I could see toiletries and shaving stuff on the floor in front of the washer and dryer. My hubby would place a towel on the dryer and place his shaving and other things on top of the towel. It appeared that "someone" had pulled the towel part way off the dryer and some of the things were on the floor, the rest of it was not far behind.

I asked my hubby why was he yelling at our son, he replied that our son had been in there pulling on the towel, I informed him that our son had been with me the whole time, he had not gone into the bathroom, I even heard the stuff hitting the floor, we had been in the kitchen when that happened.

The shower was a walk in shower, with room for 2, the door was a sliding door with translucent glass, my hubby never said that he saw anyone, but SOMEONE pulled that towel, and no the washer and dryer were not running at the time. At first my hubby said that I had put our son up to doing that as a prank, eventually I convinced him that neither of us did it.

I was not happy living there, I missed my family very much, especially my mother. I didn't get along with my mother in law, we just had different opinions about nearly everything, from how to raise my son, what foods to cook, to what books I read from the library. I spent a lot of time upstairs in my room during the day, the only time I felt even semi-comfortable in the house was after everyone went to bed. I would sit up in the den watching TV. One night I felt something warm and furry rub against my feet. I pulled my feet up and looked, I saw nothing. The only light in the room was coming from the TV. This felt like a small cat or kitten. This happened nearly every night after that, I never saw anything, I just felt the furry sensation on my feet. There were no animals in that house, at least not ones that anyone could see. :) This was comforting to me.

That is about everything I can remember, it seems like a lot, but this took place over a 9 month period. I spent the winter and spring in Oregon, and as pretty as Oregon is, and as nice as the people there are, all I wanted to do was go home to Texas. I finally got my wish and I have not left Texas since. :)

A Day In The Life

Since I've seen spirits and other such activity all of my life, I tend to forget that most people don't see these sorts of things, at least not on a daily basis, many of you must wonder what it's like, is my daily life like The Amityville Horror or like the movie Poltergeist? Hardly. Though there were a few "interesting" occurrences during my early teen and pre-teen years, it was nothing like you see in the movies.

Well, let me give you a theoretical day in my life.

I wake up, I go to the bathroom, I wash up for the day, I get dressed, I take my dog out for a walk, I see a bird in a tree, I go to water the garden, I see a bird fly by, I walk back to my house, I fix breakfast, we eat. I do some computer work, I see a bird out the window in the bird bath. Now it's time for lunch, so I fix lunch and we eat. I take the leftovers outside to feed the wild animals, a few birds sit in a tree, watching me place the food on the ground. I do the dishes, work on a few more chores around the house. I do more computer work. Now it's time for dinner, I look around to see what I can fix, the phone rings, it's my Dad, I talk to him while I fix dinner, I hear a sound outside and look just in time to see a hummingbird leaving the feeder. We eat dinner, I do the dishes, do a few more chores, do more computer work then it's time for bed.

Seems pretty ordinary wouldn't you say? Did you notice the theme here? Yes, the birds, now if you replace the birds with spirits, then you would have a typical day for me. Perhaps not that often in fact, usually once or twice a day. The reason I used birds as an example is birds, for most people are an everyday fact of life, you go outside, or look outside and you will probably see a bird, though most of you wouldn't notice the birds, they are so ordinary and such a common occurrence, the fact is eventually you would (probably) notice if you didn't see birds after a while, how long do you think it would take? I remember right after 9-11, when all of the airports were shut down, we lived near DFW airport, and seeing airplanes in the sky was completely normal, but I will tell you that it was eerie when days and weeks went by with no aircraft of any sort in the sky, the lack of them was noticeable even though we didn't really pay attention to them otherwise.

Now, I'll repeat my theoretical day with the spirit activity.

I wake up, I go to the bathroom, I wash up for the day, I get dressed, I take my dog out for a walk, I see a shadow dart near my feet, I go to water the garden, I see a spark of light float by, I walk back to my house, I fix breakfast, we eat. I do some computer work, I see a blur of a person walk past the door. Now it's time for lunch, so I fix lunch and we eat. I take the leftovers outside to feed the wild animals, on the way back in, I see someone looking through the window, watching me place the food on the ground. I do the dishes, work on a few more chores around the house. I do more computer work. Now it's time for dinner, I look around to see what I can fix, the phone rings, it's my Dad, I talk to him while I fix dinner, I hear a sound outside and look just in time to see something amorphous streak by. We eat dinner, I do the dishes, do a few more chores, do more computer work then it's time for bed.

As I said, that sort of day would be a lot of activity, I usually see one or two things a day, some days more, some days less, most of the time I don't try to investigate it, I see it, and I go on with my day, it doesn't scare me, sometimes I am startled, the same way you would be if someone jumped out and said "boo".

That's just about it, if you have any questions, please ask, I love talking about this. :)

More Mobile Home Spookies

A couple of days ago, I was cleaning a home that is behind the store where I work weekends. I have cleaned this place before, it is a rental that my boss owns. I have had experiences in this place before (click here) This time when I went there, it felt much better, a lot better than the first time I went there. Sound carries in a strange way there, I can hear things like cars driving by, much clearer than I think I should, I don't know if it's just the way the house is situated, it's pretty far from the road, and on more than one occassion I went to a window or the front door to see if someone was driving up, it turned out to be cars on the road, no where near the house.

This time when I was cleaning, I had the front door open, I had already cleaned the front room, swept and mopped the floor, I was working on the kitchen. I walked back into the front room and on the floor, in front of the door, there was a piece of wood, this had been broken off a larger piece, possibly part of the deck or trim around the door, this piece of wood shouldn't have been there, I had just cleaned that part of the house and I would not have missed a piece of wood this large. It was 3 inches long, and maybe 1/4 inch thick, it was laying on the floor, just inside the door. I went outside to see if there was someone around, no one was anywhere near the house. I swept the wood outside and asked for whatever did it to do it again. It didn't happen again, but that was strange. It didn't scare me, it just made me realize that there is still something there.

Intent

Intent, what exactly does that mean? Here is what Dictionary.com said

in⋅tent
1  /ɪnˈtɛnt/ [in-tent]
–noun
1. something that is intended; purpose; design; intention: The original intent of the committee was to raise funds.
2. the act or fact of intending, as to do something: criminal intent.
3. Law. the state of a person's mind that directs his or her actions toward a specific object.
4. meaning or significance.

in⋅tent
2  /ɪnˈtɛnt/ [in-tent]
–adjective
1. firmly or steadfastly fixed or directed, as the eyes or mind: an intent gaze.
2. having the attention sharply focused or fixed on something: intent on one's job.
3. determined or resolved; having the mind or will fixed on some goal: intent on revenge.
4. earnest; intense: an intent person.

So what does that have to do with anything? I am here to tell you it has to do with everything! Believe it or not, your thoughts have control over what your life is like, more than you realize. It is even thought (no pun intended) that our thoughts create our reality. I don't know if I believe that completely, but I do believe that our thoughts and intentions do create or affect much of our reality. How often have you been in a situation where you had a negative thought, "I'm not going to get that raise / That bird will probably poop on my newly washed car / I'll probably trip going up those stairs...", well without realizing it you are creating that reality, and chances are those things will happen just as you "predicted".

Now think of a time when you were doing something, like playing a sport or a video game, and you were "in the zone", you were perfect, you were on your game... you didn't "think" about it, you just did it. So what was the difference? Well, it's really no difference, it was intent all along, when you were thinking negative thoughts, or when you were thinking positive thoughts, they came true, yes, it is that simple.

So why doesn't it seem to work all the time? If you "wish" for a million dollars, to win the lottery, or something like that, and it doesn't work, I don't have an answer, but it works often enough, why not use it to your benefit? I can say that I personally believe we all have lessons to learn while living our lives, and I believe that some things that you want to happen would get in the way of something else you are supposed to be doing. I have a real life example, a number of years ago, my mother was killed in a car accident, she was a security guard for a big name company, they worked her far FAR too many hours, she was coming off shift, going back to the office, according to the witnesses, she apparently fell asleep at the wheel, she rolled out into an intersection and was hit by a taxi, she died shortly after that. After I investigated what had happened, I talked to a lawyer and the lawyer said that the company was at fault, working her so many hours, we had a case. So we sued, we fought this for several years, bantering back and forth, we were pretty sure that the company would eventually make an offer, we assumed it would be a large offer. Eventually my lawyer contacted an "expert" in the field of sleep deprivation and driving, he told us that based on what he could see, even though the company was in the wrong, there was no precedents for this and chances would be a judge would not award us anything. So I was given the choice to continue or quit, my lawyer clearly didn't want to continue, he had spent many years and lots of money out of his own pocket, (it cost me nothing), so I figured if he was willing to give up, we didn't have a chance so after discussing it with my sister, we decided to give up.

On the surface that sounds like a negative thing, my mother was dead, the company that was responsible got off with only a slight inconvenience, and we received no compensation. Now that I look back on all of this, as hard as it was, it turned out to be a positive thing not to win any money from this. Had I won the money, I was planning on buying a house, this was just before the housing crash, I would have been saddled with a house in a neighborhood that I wouldn't have wanted to spend the rest of my life in, I probably would not have been able to sell the house for any amount of money, and I would not have been in a position to buy the property where I live now. I am living the life I have always dreamed about, that probably wouldn't have happened if I had won that money.

Sometimes the things you think you want are not the things you need, plain and simple, and because we don't see the big picture, we can be our biggest stumbling block. Now comes intent, you have to find that place where you are "in the zone", it's not as hard as you might think, one of the ways I do it is by focusing on a specific thing, in my case, it's usually my hands, generally all I have to do is think about my hands and in a few seconds I begin to feel a tingling sensation in my palms. It doesn't matter where my hands are, if they are together or not, I still feel that sensation, I usually put my hands together in front of me, palms facing, hands cupped, but not touching. I imagine I am creating an energy ball that is floating between my hands. Another thing I do is I look "through" my hands, I see the space between my hands but do not focus directly on this, I look beyond my hands so that my hands go out of focus, then I "look" at my hands while they are still out of focus. I know this may sound strange, and even complicated, this is just how I do it, it's not necessarily how you will do it, this has evolved from simply trying to see the energy lines or webs coming from my hands into this set of steps I do.

Anyhoo, I will pray my intent into that energy forming in my hands and send it out to work. I was concerned about my son a few nights ago, he is in the Army and is stationed in Iraq. I simply placed my hands together without touching, the tingling sensation began immediately, I prayed my intent into that energy and sent it to my son. Now before we go any further, I must state that I am a Christian, and everything I do in this realm is in the name of Jesus, I am using the gifts given to me by God, I do not call on any other force, I believe all of this ultimately comes from God, I am merely tapping into this higher power. Now I can see two groups of people, those who do not believe in God or religion, this would be offensive to them, and those who are Church going Christians who would also be offended by my beliefs and think I am going to Hell for dabbling in witchcraft. All I can say is, I'm glad I don't have their limitations, I do believe that all things were created by God, therefore my gifts are also from God, the spiritual energies are also of God, or at the very least, a neutral force that can be tapped into and used either for beneficial or detrimental purposes, no different from any other gift or ability, some people play music, some people are artists, some people can see spirits and tap into the energies that surround each and every one of us.

As for the Christians who would condemn my actions and beliefs as demonic, I can only point you to the Bible, the parts that aren't usually read in Church, the parts that teach us how to test the spirits to see if they are of or from God, I don't know what else to tell you except don't judge me lest you be judged yourselves, those without sin get to throw the first stone and such... (sorry, I couldn't bring myself to say "ye" in the lest ye be judged line, I don't believe that throwing "old English" around or going "King James" makes my words any more Godly).

I digress, so back to the subject, intent, that is what prayer is, only we usually do it wrong, or should I say, there is a better way, a more effective way to do it, instead of whining and begging for what you want, try stating what you want to be true, thanking God for it and leaving it alone to happen. Say you are not happy with your appearance, you would like to lose a few pounds, you might be thinking or saying:

Why am I so fat?
I wish I wasn't so fat.
I wish I was thinner.
I wish I could look like _______.
Why can't I look like ________.
Why can't I be thinner?
I'm so ugly. fat.
I'll never be ________.

Now, when you say these things, even in your mind, you are stating your intent, if your intent is negative, or detrimental, then that is exactly what you will achieve. Now let's turn those statements around and make them positive or beneficial:

I am thinner
I am thin
I am healthy
I am happy with my appearance
I am happy with myself

or how about, "I thank you God for this body, bless it and balance it for health and happiness, in the name of Jesus, I pray, Amen." BTW, "amen" simply means, I believe, I agree, or so be it.

I could go on, I think you get the picture, you need to state, in the positive, in the now, how you want things to be, as you re-format your mind to think in the now and in the positive, your body and health will catch up with what you are stating. You can do this for anything. You are planting the seeds of tomorrow, just like any gardener, that gardener wouldn't go out into the garden and expect to see plants growing there unless he/she had planted some seeds, once you plant those seeds, you know that plants will grow, sometimes weeds (detrimental thoughts) will try to grow, you have to remove those weeds, do it while they are small and easy to pull out, if you allow those weeds to grow, it will crowd out the beneficial plants you want to grow and it will be harder to remove without damaging the beneficial plants.

Intent, grow some beneficial intent today!

One of my favorite mantras I made up when I worked for Curves goes like this:

I am happy
I am healthy
I have everything I need

I am happy
I am healthy
I have everything I want

I would say this 10 times in a row at least once a day, out loud, eventually your beneficial intent will overcome the detrimental intent, good things will happen, give it a try, what do you have to lose?

Mobile Home Spookies And An Update

Today, well technically yesterday now, I was asked to clean a mobile home that had just became vacant, it needed to be cleaned before the next tenants arrive. So I worked on getting the place detailed. I went in to a nearly empty place, fairly clean, it just needed some major detailing.

In pretty short order, I began to "feel" the place, normally I have to be in a place a few times before I start feeling anything in it. Not in this case, I began to feel things right away. I didn't actually see or hear anything, but I could sure feel something, or multiple somethings there. The only way I can explain it is it felt disconcerting, almost nightmarishly so. I would not want to spend the night in this place, sleeping would be impossible. Imagine being thrown into a place with lots of people moving around erratically and bumping into you, not like they are doing it on purpose, but it's still happening, that's how it felt there.

I know the person who did live there, this person seemed normal at first, but then started acting odd, this person it turned out was bi-polar, and not on medication. Things got real bad for this person, this person thought they could see demons, started thinking their friends were demons, let's just say it got real dicey for everyone involved, worse things happened but it's not necessary to give a laundry list of everything.

When I went in to clean, I wasn't thinking about any of this, I was concentrating on doing my job, and even after I started feeling the weird feelings there, I still didn't think about this person until later. I wonder if this is a residual of the energy from this person, or if it what may have caused this person to go off the deep end. I realize that the bi-polar condition was already present, so it's hard to say which came first. I wished I could have gone in there before this person lived there, I am curious about how that place felt before this person was around.

The more I think about it, the more I lean toward the energy being residual, I didn't feel anything intelligent, it just felt disconcerting, I imagine that is how this person felt inside. I will be cleaning this place again after the next people leave in about a week, maybe I can try to do something to clear the negative energy. BTW, that person is getting the help they need, I wish them well.

UPDATE
I spoke with my sister on the phone the other day, she had read my description of the dark, rolling cloud like thing in my neighbor's hall. She suggested that it may be something that she sees in her house. What she sees as a doorway or portal, it gets bigger and smaller, when it gets too big for her comfort level, she asks her husband to shrink it down, and he does. I don't know if this is what is in my neighbor's house, but it certainly is a possibility. I have seen portals or doorways before, that's not how they have appeared to me in the past, that doesn't mean it's not a doorway or portal though, I will keep my mind open about this.

Neighbor's House - Update

Things have been very quiet at my neighbor's house, in the last couple of weeks the entity in the hall (the one where I can see the top of the head walking back and forth) has been not present, the little dog Angel still shows herself on occasion, and the dark rolling shadow in the hall is still present.

There have been a few changes in that house, my neighbor had an accident at work and severely (chemically) burned his eyes, in the midst of all of this, a lady that he worked with started taking care of him while he convalesced. This is a lady that he had been interested in but couldn't get up enough nerve to ask her out. I have always believed that things happen for a reason, even if that reason isn't apparent, I believe this accident, as terrible as it was, was instrumental in bringing these two together, they didn't have to go through the akward first few dates, they completely bypassed all of that.

I talked to my neighbor last night to find out if he had detected any "activity" in the house, he said it had been quiet, I told him that I had been experiencing the same quietness. I suggested that it may be a case of his late wife (if that was the one in the hallway that I see walking around) might have hung around with the intention of watching over him, and now, that isn't needed, he has someone there to take care of him, perhaps it was her time to move on, my neighbor agreed and we all considered it a good thing.

I'll still be looking for the other entities that I know are there, but I suspect that I will not be seeing the one in the hallway, I'll keep you updated. :)

ps
My neighbor's eyes are healing up nicely, one word of advice, if you are unclogging a drain using a chemical drain cleaner, be sure to put the lid back on as soon as you use it, NEVER set it down on sink or tub with the lid off, if you accidentally knock it over, you will be sorry!